Somebody had to say it.

Thank you, Chelsea G., for hitting just the right note of amalgamated fury, indignation and pointed egalitarianism here.

On an almost-related note, someone who doesn't know me very well recently told me that I'm too hot to fall into the sorts of complicated relational entanglements that I do-- as in, I could get anyone I wanted, so why make it so hard for myself? Even if it was true (which it's not) that I could bag any simple, available, easy boy who crosses my path, I'm pretty unmotivated to do so. It would be a waste of time (and also, boring) for me to engage in solipsistic and ruthless self-analysis in which I parse out why I choose the particularly stumbling blocks that I do (over and over and over again) in this forum, so I won't. But I bring it up because Ms. Chelsea's point about how it's not all that easy for even women far more attractive than myself to get laid on a whim --or even, in a more calculated and mindful manner-- is an awfully good one. I mean, yes, absolutely. If it gets that bad, I have people I can call. But I'm always disappointed afterwards. As much as I'd like the girl who can do it without ladeling out a puddle of what Chelsea calls "steaming emo pudding," I'm not. And I'm drawn to challenge and complication, so, no, I can't make it easy on myself.

Fomenting attachment with another human being is bound to be rife with anxiety. Love -- and the fear of not obtaining it, the fear of losing it once it's obtained, the fear of never finding it again once it's been lost -- is an anxiety-ridden condition by definition. And that's WHY it's desirable. In other words, it's not boring. And being bored is a lot worse than being anxious. We don't fall in love to make our lives easier in the first place, so why would anyone assume that I would opt for an easier road just because my physical appearance and the fact that I'm a woman might provide a slim little by-way through the barricade that usually blocks said road?