This is how it's done.

Just in case any amongst my flock are interested in making their own niche-market porn films, I thought I might direct you all to this fascinating article. It offers some VERY detailed instructions on how to accomplish a feat that is widely rumored to consist largely of adult-entertainment-industry smoke and mirrors. All tied up in with sweet little spirituo-sexual ribbon, even!

For you, my stalwart clan! My perverted, research-enthusiast friends! Enjoy!