Tuesday, June 26, 2007

Can I at least pee without being patronized, please?

Lately, I've been noticing a weird thing happening to semi-public women's bathrooms all over. When I first began my current job, the women's bathroom on my floor required that female prospective urinators enter a code into a little keypad on the door to the bathroom. This was not required for male prospective urinators. Fortunately, within a couple months of my employment, they removed the keypad from the door and now anyone can charge on thru as they please. I, for one, was kinda annoyed that the whole elimination process, at work anyway, required yet another step for girls that was not required of boys (ok, I'll admit, punching 4 buttons isn't a big deal).

But beyond that, I couldn't help but to feel completely patronized by the fact that it was deemed necessary for women to have this extra level of security surrounding the lifting of skirts/dropping trou that the men who work on my floor apparently do not need (when they, uh, also lift their skirts or drop their trousers!). I mean, heaven forbid one of the nerdy old guys who works for my company got a wild hair to furtively dart into the women's bathroom and then...what?...stand on a toilet so as to peer at our dimpled little knees over the partition? I suppose this is a POSSIBLE scenario, but it's HIGHLY IMPROBABLE, don't you think? Really, I do not fear for my safety at work, nor do I worry about peeping toms. At my last job? Where I acquired a few stalkers over the years? Well, that was a different story... but, even there, it was more likely that the nerdy old men (different nerdy old men, by the way) were gossiping about who'd seen my body parts rather than trying to capture their very own glimpse of them.

I bring this up because, while I'm in OH for work and working in rented office space, I couldn't help but notice a little green plaque underneath the picture of a skirt-wearing figure by the women's bathroom (in said rented office space) that read "Shelter Zone." Directly across from the women's bathroom is the men's bathroom, but there is no analogous sign underneath the pants-wearing figure's picture. There are no locks on either door and they're roughly 20 feet apart... so, I wonder exactly how sheltered a woman running into this bathroom might actually be, but that's kinda beside the point.

Why is it that there is this perception that women need all this sheltering to begin with? I mean, this is kinda the same concept as the "Take Back the Night" business, isn't it? Like somehow, we aren't able to function normally within a totally civilized office space without needing special hideouts and underground networks? Or maybe, there's an assumption that we need someplace to which we can run after a dramatic tearful exit? (Because girls LOVE to make dramatic, tearful exits at work, right?) Or maybe these shelter zones are like those menstruation tents of yore (yeah, let's send all the chicks to a smelly little room so we can get them off our hands while they're bleeding... and let's call it a "shelter zone!" Brilliant! They'll never catch on!)

In truth, I have a hunch that it's really a bunch of misguided womenfolk who are behind these little insipid security measures. I imagine they're probably very well-intentioned in that they think they're providing a safe exit to sad little girls who find themselves in sticky situations. But what they're missing is that, by assuming that women should not EXPECT to be safe in their own workplaces, they've instituted this entirely dis-empowering little practice of putting signs and keypads up in front of doors behind which women might be naked from the waist down for about 90 seconds at a time.

And I suppose these small measures are resulting from various and assorted workplace problems that have arisen and have since been categorized under the heading of Sexual Harassment. And sure, women (and men) should not be physically assaulted in their offices. Nor should women's (and men's) employment or promotional status or payscale be affected by their gender or sexual habits. Nor should women (or men) have to put up with anyone continually infusing the professional atmosphere with sexual entendres (OK, fine, I'll admit, I'm a little guilty of this one). But the fact that women (and men, but particularly women) should have an EXPECTATION of freedom from all these things should render the aforementioned keypads and signs unnecessary. And because they SHOULD be unnecessary, I can't help but feel that their presence is entirely condescending and infantalizing (oh, please, big, tough keypad! Take care of me, save me, for I am weak and cannot handle the mere threat of someone watching me pee! *simper*).

Can we all just agree that the first step to not feeling victimized is NOT assuming that women are, by definition or by nature, victims in the first place? Please?

12 comments:

Ginger said...

I'm commenting on your blog like whoa tonight, but you just mentioned Take Back the Night--officially Ginger's favorite "anti-feminist" rant topic of all time.

In the spirit of your place of employment, I present:

Ginger & Marjorie's Next Happy Hour Discussion Agenda

1. Little Children
2. Black Snake Moan
3. The "culture of victimization"--if you will--and the atrocity of Take Back the Night

I CAN'T WAIT!!!!!!

brownrabbit said...

I should say that I mentioned that "shelter zone" sign to my friend Chris, The Queer Republican (sigh, I know). He commented that he was also offended by such a sign, because it seems to imply that women need shelter from men... which, indeed, is a very good point.

I am so FED UP with gender roles lately! The more the world seems to make way for women to do as they want, the more rules we seem to devise to remind us that, really, we're not supposed to.

ARGH!

brownrabbit said...

Ginger, yes! I'm beginning to think we just need to set up weekly meetings to discuss the crap that turns us on and/or pisses us off. Mostly, I say that these discussions need to happen so frequently because one or the other of us is always pissed off or turned on. Clearly, this dynamic begs for conversational scrutiny.

And, goddamnit, I can't wait for Black Snake Moan hardly a second longer!

This is me. This is my quiver of anticipation.

Ginger said...

I'll have my last swig of pinot grigio for the night to that!

(Once I'm a little more settled into my job, e.g., after this Friday, let's make solid plans. Via email, of course, since all those people who search for semi-strange sexual things and find your blog should not know where we are meeting :)

brownrabbit said...

Right! excellent point!

Dirty stalkers, beware! We know you like challenges so we won't make it too easy for you!

Joltin' Django said...

I've been meaning to ask you:

When a brown rabbit's tanning, is that anything like a brown-eye that's blinkin'?

Enlighten me, please!

brownrabbit said...

You sure are dirty for a conservative...

It doesn't really mean anything. It's just a language-y sort of joke with myself. For once, I titled something with the intention that it be free of sexual association.

jb said...

I would take a sign that says 'shelter zone' to be a place where kids can run for shelter if they are in trouble. Not women. But it still doesn't make sense--especially since if a kid ran into an empty women's bathroom while trying to get away from . . . say . . . a child molester, then the kid is both literally and figuratively screwed. So whatever the point of the shelter zone sign is, its in a bad place. I know I have seen these 'safe place' signs before in public places--but they are usually posted at a place where a responsible adult is going to be at all times (like uh, a reception office or a security guard stand)--not a place that could be empty for large periods of time and where the room is sectioned off into privatized stalls ideal for hiding ones molestative activities.

Or maybe this sign actually is for women and it means that there is a room in the bathroom with a tub and some Calgon soap. Calgon, take me away . . . to the shelter zone.

brownrabbit said...

The sign wasn't one of those big yellow signs you see at grocery stores. It was small and green and it was clearly intended to designate a place where women could go to get away from men. It's a different sort of thing entirely.

And no, there was no tub.

And seeing as there was no lock on the door, the only thing really preventing a man from following a woman into this bathroom was the general rule of social decorum that dictates a man not go into a women's public bathroom. Also, seeing as the sign was in a building used for offices and community college classrooms, I doubt there would be a whole lot of kids in need of sheltering there anyway. Beyond that, because the sign designated the women's bathroom as the "shelter zone," what about male children? I would think they'd be disinclined to run in there if they were in trouble.

And so, I stand by my assertion that the concept of "shelter zones" is patronizing to women and should be offensive to men, seeing as your average well-adjusted guy bears no threat to any woman.

If this were the only instance I'd observed in which unnecessary measure were taken towards the "protection" of only female employees, it wouldn't tick me off so much. But it really bugs the shit out of me that, because women are no longer exceptions to rules in the workplace, the general corporate culture sees fit to reinforce the notion that women are still weaker, and therefore more subject to victimization. It's appalling.

jb said...

wow--so its actually meant for women--i agree that's ridiculous. If they had one of those signs on the womens restroom at my work:

1. I would wonder what male started such angst

2. Would lobby for one on the male restroom in order (for equality) and to have a shelter zone to which I could run from the more persistent of my female admirers.

brownrabbit said...

But, see, then, you'd still have to contend with all those equally persistent male admirers. Poor you! There's just no way out, is there?

jb said...

yes, good point--again that stupid sign helps nothing. Maybe the shelter zone signs on the womens restroom are for guys to get away from other guys. Then again--there would be little to comfort a man in a women's RESTROOM. Anyway. How about this:

Shelter Zone: The Series
Episode 1

women #1 is fixing her hair in the mirror when women #2 bursts through the door.

women #2: Shelter Zone! Shelter Zone! (She sees women #1 and runs to her) Is this the Shelter Zone? Help me!! Ya gotta help me!! (then going back to the door) Doesn't this door lock?

women #1: (chewing gum as she talks) Slow down, tell me what happened sweetie?

women #2: he . . . he tried to rape . . . (she crumbles to the floor crying)

women #1: (still chewing gum)will ya came to the right place, its just lucky i was here. (putting her lipstick away and taking her gum out and holding it in her hand, she goes over and kneels next to women #2) take your time hun and tell me what happened--you're in a safe place now.

women #2: Its Johnny, he tried to rape me again!!

women #1: wait--johnny? how do you know his name?

women #2: well, it was a uh date rape type situation.

women#1: (puts the gum back in her mouth and smacks even louder now) oh i see, you with your short, tight skirt and your make up and your push up bra and your wink-wink, taking up all the sure things in this building. Get out of here, you tease!

The Frame Freezes and Elizbeth Berkley, of Saved by the Bell and Showgirls fame walks in front of the scene.

Elizbeth: If you've been raped then you are not alone. And if you like to dress like a tramp, slut or tease or take off your clothes in really bad movies to announce your arrival into adulthood to get away from your, "I'm so excited," adolescent moment, then you are not alone either. That's why the Concerned Women for America is placing these signs on womens' restrooms all across America. Because they are concerned--about something. But please use them wisely. Thank you and say no to drugs.